As I type this, roughly 30 years ago I graduated from the police academy. That was three years after I had graduated from the Military Police academy. So when I met my wife in 1989, I’d been a police officer (military or civilian) for roughly six years. We marred in 1994 and are now approaching our 22nd wedding anniversary (she’s a very tolerant woman). Throughout that time I’ve had quite the experience with several rings. I won’t share with you the touching (mushy) tale of how I ended up with an engagement ring – but I did. Keep that in mind: For me, in 1994, wedding ring on my left ring finger and engagement ring on my right pinky finger (so they didn’t rub together).
At one point on the street, I was in a foot chase, went over a fence and caught my wedding ring on the fence. My hand stopped buy my 165 pounds of me plus gear didn’t. THANKFULLY I didn’t get my finger ripped off or degloved. What I got was one hell of a tear laceration around the base joint of my ring finger. After that, when I worked, I stopped wearing my wedding ring. I kept wearing the engagement ring. Then one night on the street, I got my hand slammed in a car door and the engagement ring was crushed onto my pinky. It probably stopped the knuckle from being broken but it had to be cut off.
Years later QALO started making their rings. My wife was delighted beyond words when I started wearing a wedding ring 24/7 again. In fact, SHE is the one who decided that from now on, unless we’re getting dressed up for a formal event, I don’t wear my gold wedding band. Her attitude is, “Why risk it? Just wear the far less expensive but just as meaningful QALO band.”
Now, this blog isn’t meant to be an advertisement for QALO. I’m writing it because I just returned from Philadelphia where the Democratic National Convention was being held and I talked to a LOT of cops who don’t wear their wedding ring just because of the potential for injury or loss. Several of them noticed me wearing my thin-blue-line QALO ring and asked about it.
If you look at the accompanying picture you’ll see four rings: my gold wedding band is on the left. Next to it is a gray QALO ring, then a camouflage QALO ring and then my thin-blue-line ring. If you look closely you’ll see that the symbol on the outside of the gray ring is about worn off and you can’t see the one on the camouflage ring at all. There never was one on the thin-blue-line ring due to the manufacturing process that involves bonding in the different color silicone in the middle.
The reason you the symbol is worn on the gray band and obliterated on the camo band is because I’ve worn them so much. I’ve had them both for about two years now and switched from the gray band to the camo band for daily wear because my wife has matching bands and we make it a point to always wear the same design ring. Why?
One of the objections I’ve heard voiced about wearing QALO rings instead of the actual gold, silver, platinum, titanium, etc wedding band is, “But that’s not the ring blessed by the priest/minister/reverend, etc in our wedding.” My wife and I had all of the QALO rings we procured blessed. We had a small ceremony with our minister and said essentially the same prayers and vows with these rings as we did with the gold bands we exchanged way back in 1994. To US, the rings represent the same commitment and honor that our gold bands do – but at roughly $15 each, if we lose or break them we’re not nearly as worried about it.
We started out wearing the gray ones a lot but after starting a nutrition and fitness program, my wife’s gray one started to get looser than she was comfortable with, so we switched to the camo for our most frequent daily wear. After the attack in Dallas and a discussion we had about whether or not we’d be both vocal and visible about our undoubted support for law enforcement, we’ve switched to the thin-blue-line rings. I wear it every day and will continue to do so until it breaks or wears through. I’m FAR from that.
That thin-blue-line ring was noticed a lot in Philadelphia. Brother and sister cops can spot that thin-blue-line a mile away. Even though I wasn’t in a formal uniform while in Philly, I was dressed in a casual manner that was easily recognizable as off-duty law enforcement. I got a lot of handshakes and shared the dinner table or space with more Philly cops than I could name or count. I’m guessing about a dozen of them saw and commented on the ring. More than one asked if they could examine it, taking it carefully and smiling as they squeezed it flat. I had to stop one guy from trying to put it onto his finger… sorry. It’s MY wedding ring. It doesn’t go on anyone else’s hand.
So, what’s the point of all of this? There is another option to the metal bands so many of us wear AND the thin-blue-line serves a unique purpose – at least in my circumstance this past few days: it served as another form of identification that I was a good guy; a part of the blue family. It was as important these past few days as my apparel, hidden badge and weapon.
