In our last article, we looked at the sources and threats of negative thinking (negativity) to our emotional and physical health, with a particular emphasis on how it is so common among law enforcement professionals and the toll it extracts from them. To overcome negativity, and avoid and reverse the damage it causes, requires concerted effort on our part to identify where and why negativity is thriving and then change our outlook and perspective to combat it.
A lot of negativity is a byproduct of perceived helplessness. Among cops this can stem from external criticism, internal politics, anger or depression about real or perceived anti-police sentiment, seeming media bias, or the fickleness of the legal and policy processes directing their work. The average cop has very little control over any of it and, to someone used to and comfortable being in control the feeling is disconcerting.
To know this is to understand our principle we teach to overcome negativity and negative thoughts:
The only thing any of us truly control is how we choose to respond to the stresses and demands of any given moment.
This is not to say you shouldn’t attack the problems and frustrations of work and life – of course you should, if for no other reason than the power of choosing the fight – but just know it is a battle that may need joined and rejoined again and again, and you may simply lose. Institutions and individuals are driven to stasis and motivated to resist change and quash dissent; ours is a bureaucratic world, after all. The victory may be in merely trying to effect change, with the benefit purely intrinsic. That is okay and sometimes all you can hope for. And then sometimes you’ll win!
Your locus of control and where you can actually guarantee change is in your actions, efforts, and even thoughts about the challenges and frustrations before you.
We only have about 60 seconds to overcome negative thoughts before they start to take root.
Accepting negative thoughts, perceptions, and beliefs without first challenging their truth allows them to become our default view of what is happening to and around us. They set the standard against which later, less-pessimistic ideas will be judged and, unless we’ve done our intellectual legwork to vet the negativity cloud our judgment of more positive experiences. Being open to possibly being wrong, or acknowledging we don’t have all the information necessary to yet formulate a viewpoint, forces us examine our own thoughts and beliefs about the world with a critical eye and be open to changing our minds. Seemingly counter to the attitude of the typically self-assured cop, this is actually a very freeing concept. You don’t have to be right!
There is evidence, however, that the trick lies in rapidly challenging negativity; after about 60 seconds our brains will throw the default switch out of habit, and change becomes much harder in the face of a strong psychological drive to defend our existing worldview against challenges.
Understanding and practicing mindfulness — the awareness of our moment-to-moment “where am I now” experience of thoughts and feelings — is proven to be highly effective combatting negativity, depression, and anxiety.
You’ve probably heard of mindfulness in many settings now; it is an old practice with Eastern roots gaining increasing traction in our busy Western culture. Beyond therapist’s offices and yoga studios, mindfulness is big and getting bigger because it is very effective! Remaining aware of our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations in moment-to-moment life allows us to experience them non-judgmentally and without their controlling us and pushing emotional buttons. Emotions are felt, experienced, and owned without letting them attack us. Mindfulness has been an impactful part of various treatment modalities with great success.
For example, if we experience something – a thought, an antagonist, and emotional reaction – likely to lead to rooted ad toxic negative thoughts, being mindful of how it is affecting us in the moment lets us get a handle on our thoughts, feel but not be consumed by the emotions it prompted, and integrate both into our experience while the rational mind maintains control to override the negativity.
Slowing down our minds leads to a more positive and self-aware perspective.
Taking time to ask ourselves a few questions about our experience is beneficial to mindfulness. Ask:
“Is the information I’m receiving real and accurate?”
“Am I interpreting it correctly?”
“Is there more to the story I should find out, what don’t I know, and what have I not considered?”
Again, endemic among cops is the tendency – a need, even – to be decisive and sure of one’s judgment. In a job where hesitancy can undermine authority at best, and cost you your life at worst, decisiveness is a strength. We all need to know when to let go of the need, however, and look for more information. We’ve all seen highly confident and competent police officers, sure of themselves and their experience, with a long list of successes, close their minds off to alternative possibilities too soon, refuse to look beyond their hunch or first impression, and overcommit to a wrong working theory, to their later dismay. Maybe it has even happened to you. It’s happened to me.
Slowing down, when it is safe to do so, and opening your mind to alternative explanations and realities is a powerful tool against both professional mistakes and personal negativity.
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It is understandable so many cops fall prey to negativity in a political climate of such criticism and distrust. It is also disheartening to know how damaging such negativity is. Mastering the skills to overcome negativity is a crucial need for your emotional and physical health. Fortunately, with a little work they are quite easy to incorporate into everyday practice.
Michael Wasilewski
Althea Olson, LCSW and Mike Wasilewski, MSW have been married since 1994. Mike works full-time as a police officer for a large suburban Chicago agency while Althea is a social worker in private practice in Joliet & Naperville, IL. They have been popular contributors of Officer.com since 2007 writing on a wide range of topics to include officer wellness, relationships, mental health, morale, and ethics. Their writing led to them developing More Than A Cop, and traveling the country as trainers teaching “survival skills off the street.” They can be contacted at [email protected] and can be followed on Facebook or Twitter at More Than A Cop, or check out their website www.MoreThanACop.com.
Althea Olson
Althea Olson, LCSW and Mike Wasilewski, MSW have been married since 1994. Mike works full-time as a police officer for a large suburban Chicago agency while Althea is a social worker in private practice in Joliet & Naperville, IL. They have been popular contributors of Officer.com since 2007 writing on a wide range of topics to include officer wellness, relationships, mental health, morale, and ethics. Their writing led to them developing More Than A Cop, and traveling the country as trainers teaching “survival skills off the street.” They can be contacted at [email protected] and can be followed on Facebook or Twitter at More Than A Cop, or check out their website www.MoreThanACop.com.
