I saw a sight the other day that put me on edge. I was on a ramp entering onto I-190 South and there, standing on the shoulder, were three deer. They were poised there alertly, their attention fixed across the road - and it looked like they were going to try to cross it.
Bad idea.
I-190 was busy with semi-tractor trailer rigs just coming off the Lewiston-Queenston International Bridge between Canada and the United States. You never know how long it will take to cross the bridge; it backs up badly. Once across, the truckers are ready to make up for lost time. The speed limit jumps up to 65 and no one is very shy about acceleration. The highway gently curves there and goes under an overpass. The deer were on the far side of that overpass, so any truckers coming from the bridge would not see the deer until they were right upon them.
I held my breath as I passed them as slowly as I could (not wanting to get back-ended by a semi myself, any more than I wanted to make Bambi McNuggets out of the deer). Once past and safely onto the highway, I kept an eye on the rearview mirror as long as I could, which was not long due to the curve in the highway. I said a prayer of thanks for getting past safely, said a prayer of protection for the deer and the motorists, and drove on feeling sad. What are you going to do? If you stop to shoo them back into the bush, you could just as easily shoo them right across the highway and into harm's way.
Keep moving along, folks - nothing to see here... yet.
Sometimes you can just see disaster coming - and I know this is often true for cops. You keep picking up the same kid for under-age drinking, and you can see the kid is heading for trouble but no one seems to be intervening, except you and your colleagues.
You keep getting called to the same address for domestic violence, and you can see them heading for trouble but no one is making them accountable, except you and your colleagues.
You keep getting called to the same address for a neighbor dispute, and you can see it escalating, but no one is trying to head them off except you and your colleagues. It gets old after awhile, and you begin to wonder if people are even capable of change.
Well, back to my deer. I went on my way, going on about the day's appointments. Several hours later, I was on my way back home, back on the I-190, this time heading north, and wondering what I would find when I got back to the ramp. Dead deer at the side of the road? Skid marks and broken glass? Bloodstains on the pavement? Highway closed as they were still cleaning up from a multi-vehicle pile-up? Or... nothing?
What a blessing that would be, if I arrived at the scene and found no sign of trouble. It's kind of a strange thought, isn't it, to feel blessed by what isn't there? But that's what I wanted to see: a normal, "empty" roadway that would tell me the deer and the motorists had all gone their way safely. And that's exactly what I found - what a relief!
Perhaps it happens more often than we realize that things are poised to go disastrously wrong, but through some grace or good fortune, or someone's hard work and risk, disaster is averted. Certainly we know the opposite experience: we remember the site of the fatal accident, the house fire, the suicide.
First responders are all too aware of such places, and no matter how well you have done your work, these places are always invisibly marked by the trauma you've seen there. But, I think there is another invisible mark, one harder to detect. I "saw" it on the highway where the deer weren't hit. There are so many ways living things can be put through the wringer! Yet, in spite of that fragility and vulnerability, the world chugs along in beauty and new life as well as ugliness and death, and who knows how many close calls happen around us, or even through us?
As powerless as you may feel dealing with the sort of repeat calls that I mentioned earlier, there are even more times when your intervention is effective; when you help avert disaster. You come into situations to calm folks down, stop violence, set things back aright. You intervene when you see people doing dangerous things. You remind people that they don't need to submit to abuse and that there are orderly ways to deal with their problems. You refer people to helping organizations. When someone is out of control, you put him where he can't hurt himself, or hurt other people. And while some foolish people don't heed your intervention, others certainly do heed it.
You can lose track of that fact, because it is difficult to pay attention to what doesn't happen. You don't get called again to some addresses because someone has moved out of an abusive situation and started a new life on a better footing. You don't have to deal with some kids more than once because someone actually does heed your wake-up call and intervene. You don't have a 100% success rate because the control of these things is not all in your hands - but your work does make a difference in many lives.
It is an important thing to remember, when you are burdened by the persistent foolishness of repeat offenders and wondering if you are making a difference.
