Fair warning – SPOILER ALERT –
Not long ago I finished binging the television show LONGMIRE. It’s available on Netflix and is generally about a sheriff working in a sparsely populated county in Wyoming. There is a nearby Indian reservation and he has to work, as best he can, hand-in-hand with the Tribal Police on that reservation. He has only three deputies and one of them is Victoria Moretti, a former Philadelphia police officer who relocated to Wyoming when her husband who worked in the oil industry was reassigned. Six seasons later the show comes to an end and in one of the last episodes the following occurs:
Victoria (Vic) and Sheriff Longmire (Walt) are driving along the highway and Vic is giving Walt a good bit of her mind because he keeps taking unnecessary risks and she point blank tells him that she can’t stand the thought of losing him, especially without the opportunity to say goodbye. His response was, “In this job, goodbye is always implied.” I had to hit pause and think about that. It’s a heavy thought, and 100% spot on, even if we don’t like to admit it.
God bless my wife who put up with my professional schedule and challenges for roughly 30 years. Like most couples, there were times when I was headed off to work and it followed some argument we’d had, usually over something super petty. The one thing I tried to always remember, and it’s a harsh thought: When I went out that door, however I left things with my wife might well be the last memories she ever has of me. I remember an occasion where we’d had a good shouting match and I walked out, slamming the door behind me. I got about ten minutes up the road and realized that might be how we parted – for eternity. Yes, it’s very dramatic sounding but it’s also very realistic.
Every time a law enforcement professional leaves for a shift, we recognize that it could be the last time we ever see our friends or family. When a husband and wife say goodbye, no matter which is going out the door in uniform, they both know, even if it’s unspoken, it might be their final kiss and hug goodbye. Even if GOODBYE isn’t said, it’s always implied.
I never really thought about that until I heard Walt say that in the television show, but as soon as he did I immediately knew it to be true. And while it’s not a comforting thought in any way, we would all do well to remember it. Never take “goodbye” for granted. Never just assume you’ll be coming home. When you hug your spouse or children, kiss them softly on the cheek, etc., do it with the thought that it’s meaningful. It’s not just a thing you do because you’re supposed to. It’s what you do because you value that person; you love them, care about them and will miss them while you’re working. It only makes it more meaningful when you recognize the reality, without overly dwelling on it (like I am here), when you realize it might be the last time you do it.
Goodbye is always implied in this job. Yeah.
