Letting Go

Frank Borelli
Editor-in-Chief
Officer.com

It's been my experience - and yours certainly may be different - that people have a hard time "letting go" of anything they've invested time and effort in. While most of us would nod our heads and agree that applies to things like personal relationships, how many of us don't recognize that it can also apply to old assignments or previous jobs? And the bad part (for us) is that we simply can't afford to keep investing energy into something we no longer have a reason to. In some ways it's easier to let go than in others. I guess I mean, in some situations. For instance, that significant other that you've been with for five years and now you've broken up? Especially if the other half did the breaking up and really didn't give you any kind of decent reason why. You think, "Wait a minute; I invested five years of my LIFE in this. I deserve more of an explanation; more closure." Doesn't the same thing apply to jobs? As police officers we tend to build very close friendships where we work. If we have a partner in our car every day that partner may well be our new best friend. Certainly we will experience things with that partner that are more intense and personal than we may with our "regular" best friend. If we don't have a partner but we work with a squad, then the members of our squad become a second family. If we're assigned to a special unit then that becomes the second family. Here's the challenge: what happens when we get transferred? or our partner does? What happens when we change districts? Get promoted into a different unit? I used to work for a municipality in Maryland where I felt I had invested a good chunk of my life. Sure, I did my job - just like the next guy - but I also did MORE (in my mind) than was called for by the job description. I actually CARED about the community I served and how it was growing. Therefore it irked me when I saw residents in the city - or even the city councilmembers - NOT caring. What were they thinking? Setting that aside, there came a time where I chose to resign from that employment and work elsewhere. I remain friends with a couple of the residents and sometimes hear from a city employee or two. Inevitably I will ask a couple questions about how some challenge the city faced or faces is being handled. I get an answer; discussion ensues. Why do I care? Who knows. Is it my place to have input in what happens there anymore? Absolutely not. But I have a hard time letting go. I wonder how this particularly applies to people in leadership positions. Say you have this sergeant who has been in charge of a patrol squad for a couple years. He's worked hard and formed his squad up the way he wanted it. The squad works hard - every member (how rare is that?) - and they have excellent performance records. Then that sergeant gets promoted to lieutenant and transferred to a different duty station. A senior corporal from a different district gets promoted to sergeant and, all of a sudden, the high performance squad has a new sergeant leading it. Inevitably things will change. Will the lieutenant (the old sergeant) leave it alone? The temptation will be there for him to attempt to give guidance to the new sergeant. The new sergeant may be smart to ask for it. But if the new sergeant doesn't want the guidance he may see any attempt at it as interference. How does the lieutenant handle that? He has to leave it alone. He has to accept his growth and career development and move on. He has to let go. Am I rambling? Maybe. But I think that, as we look at the new year, we tend to look back at the old one. It's the perfect opportunity to identify the changes that have occurred in your life (or career) and recognize the things that you need to let go. What do you think?