Coping with that Primal Urge
Tim Dees
Editor-in-Chief
Officer.com
An ongoing discussion in our forum concerns the practice of flirting, and how it impacts the perceived professionalism of law enforcement officers. The anecdotes that were described there brought back memories of incidents during my policing days where officers made their reputations–some good, some bad.
Female officers are not nearly as prone to this sort of snag. Women who become police officers have already set themselves apart as assertive individuals who are not easily swayed or conned. Further, only a small subset of men are drawn to powerful women in positions of authority. Some of them go for lady cops, and others for dominatrices. I wonder if it’s only a coincidence that both tend to wear dark clothing with leather accessories?
When the men are in the authority roles and have to interact with women–especially women of the same type as they would like to socialize with–you have an entirely different dynamic ongoing. Men in positions of power or celebrity seldom have difficulty attracting female company. There is a cohort of women who are drawn to power and/or fame like pilgrims to Mecca. This is how a former president could have an affair (only one of many, depending on whom you choose to believe) with an intern only a little older than his daughter. Rock stars manage to get temporary girlfriends in every town, and sometimes even have to detail a member of their entourage to pick and choose over the crop of willing candidates. And cops seem to have their share of followers, too. The most common term for these women is “badge bunny.”
You can argue that cops deserve a social life, too, and that is certainly true. Cops meet girls in the same places that other men-on-the-prowl do–in bars and nightclubs, at sporting events, at church (yes, really), and for the ones that are furthering their education, at school. Other couples meet in the workplace, as lady cops are far more likely to marry gentleman cops than they are to find a mate from the non-sworn population. There’s certainly nothing wrong with that. If it never happened, where would the next generation of cops come from? The problem is when these encounters occur on the job, with people that would otherwise be subject to the officer’s authority: traffic violators, arrestees, and the like.
The forum discussion includes several stories of female motorists trying to persuade the officer to issue a warning instead of a traffic citation by crying, or flirting, or even removing or adjusting clothing in a provocative way. Most of the officers reported that these tactics were far more likely to result in a ticket than if the person in question had done nothing at all. They recognize an attempt to manipulate them, and resent it. That is the desired response, but unfortunately, not everyone feels that way.
It’s not so much that flirting comes naturally to women as it is that people will use just about any advantage they can marshal to get a special deal. Name dropping (”Hey, do you know Officer XXX? He’s my next-door neighbor!”), attempts to gain sympathy (”Can’t you give me a break? I lost my job last week.”), and representations of some alliance or support of the police (FOP or other police association license plate ornaments, and decals, “Blue Line” bumper stickers, and PBA “associate” cards) are all common ploys. If all you have to use is sex appeal and a winning smile, there doesn’t seem to be any harm in trying it out, is there?
It seems that one doesn’t have to read very long through our “Internal Affairs” section before coming onto a story where a cop’s primal urges got the best of him. Sometimes these incidents are provoked by the “victim” (meaning whoever wasn’t the cop), and sometimes it’s the result of an outright solicitation of sex-for-favors by the officer. These things are fairly rare, or at least they aren’t officially noticed, but when they do blow up, every cop in the blast area is going to get hit by the shrapnel. Folks have an affection for exposing the foibles of people in authority, and if the authority figure is someone who is about to impose that authority on you, it’s an opportunity to play a card that is not only useful, but fun, to boot.
There could be better training for officers in the use of discretion. American police have always had some discretion in their enforcement decisions, and this is only right. Different situations justify different actions. Thievery is always wrong, but it’s much easier to empathize with the hungry man who steals basic food items than it is to do so with the teenager that’s trying to make off with a case of expensive beer. The training problem is to address the decision-making process, which factors are and aren’t relevant in considering which way to go, and insuring that two dissimilar officers are likely to come to the same decision, given the same set of circumstances, because they’re using the same criteria. This limits the effect of personal bias and attempts to sway the officer by using the strategies I mentioned earlier.
Ultimately, this problem is resolved or aggravated by the level of integrity in the officer. Officers with sound integrity will recognize when someone is trying to compromise them, and officers with lesser integrity will go along for the ride. And cops will continue to be attracted to badge bunnies, and badge bunnies to cops. They’ll meet them at the aforementioned bars, sporting events and even churches, and that basic compulsion to procreate (or at least to do something that looks a lot like it) will take over. Cops are people, and people are always going to find a place to hook up.
But, guys: don’t do it during traffic stops, no matter what she looks like.