Dating a Female Cop

Are you implying that female police officers are not "Normal"? I think the person who wrote the article did a good job of expressing her experiences as a female police officer. It sounds as though she has a lot in common with the female executive who commented on the article. I'm sure both of you are quite "feminine" in certain environments. And for the record, from an historically sociological perspective masculine and authorative tend to go hand in hand.

For reason, I really want the next person I date to be a cop. I think they're really sexy, smart, strong, and can probably take care of themselves. Any suggestions where I can hang out??

Just curious why my comments were simply removed fro the site? I expected that no one would want to take those on, but my God! Is that what we do in Police nowadays - just pretend things didn't happen?
P.S. My husband read my letter I left here before and, being a cop, he felt that the article published here is a "bit" degrading to women in other professions....

I really liked this article by a Sargeant of the Saskatoon Police Dept. Firstly, I do not think female cops are abnormal in any way. They may be tougher because they have a stressful job. I wanted to be a Police Officer here in New York City, but turned it down due to me having panic disorder(mild) and anxiety disorder(mild). I really do not like how people say that female cops are not normal in this site. I just do not like that term. Maybe they are tougher because their job demands it or something???

I just want to continue how comments like dating a female cop is not normal sort of hurts my feelings. I live in New York City, NY and some very nice young people my age, pretty girls join the police. You see them. Again, I can join the police myself because I have mild anxiety and mild panic disorder. Sorry on that. I also kind of like funny enough female cops over the males sometimes only sometimes unless they are like X or something. Recently, I mysteriously lost my glasses and spoke at TD 2 of the NYPD. The cop was of X and was a young cop and asked me a question which really was LIKED by me "Where was the LAST time you saw your glasses lost" and it was so intellecutal by this young cop of TD 2 of the NYPD, young and of X and so psychological. The two other cops there were just like bravado or something. This young cop was so good. Somehow, the glasses disappeared mysteriously on me and the young cop of X suspects they may be at work but they could also be on the street like I recall I looked in my pocket and found my driving glasses LOST COMPLETELY(just my pen in my pocket) as I was passing by a car wash a block down. Also, maybe the trip in... My boss does not care. But, just the question this young hispanic officer, of X asked me and how it is sort of still working on my mind and I am still in search mode like a child. I also see nice qualities in female cops because of CONCERN. I also brought this up with a cop at MTTF, an older black officer of the NYPD like Oprah Winfrey like that and you can tell by her LOOK at you that she was LISTENING and just CONCERNED and helped me good. This is also what I like in female cops is that they LISTEN and you walk in and you like have a mother there. She was like that and maybe they are gone and perhaps lost at work as the young hispanic officer of X today told me but.... But, I see a CONCERNED MOTHER sometimes in female cops. As for some young female cops in the NYPD, they can be like your classmate at school or something.

Just wanted to thank Susan for the article. Everything she said describes exactly the reasons why i think female officers are special and i would love to date one or marry one. I love people with values.
Plus, a busy, independent, strong-minded, motivated woman doesn't scare me at all. Eventually intrigues me.
That is why i support any woman intending to join the police.

LOL Kathryn. Your indication that female cops can't handle themselves in a brawl is ridiculous and obviously comes from being married to a sexist male cop. We do just fine and are often able to deescalate a situation to the point where it doesn't have to turn into a "brawl." Male and female cops generally have different weaknesses and strengths, so I personally am glad that both sexes are on the law enforcement team. Your idea of female cop infidelity is ridiculous as well. I have found most of my male co-workers to be about as faithful to their wives as a stray dog. They flirt. I am the one who chooses NOT to flirt back, because I don't think my husband or their wives would appreciate it. Fidelity doesn't seem to be a lived-by value in law enforcement circles, at least in my experience, so I suppose your fears may be founded....but just don't blame it on us. You want to point a finger? Try aiming at your husband.

Kathryn, I am glad that there was another cop's wife who chose to speak up here. Thank you for that! I know it's not easy to deal with it, and sure is not easy to admit. I wrote a long letter here which got removed from the site because it was, well... too honest. In that letter I shared that my husband joined the law enforcement in recent years, and I was gravely concerned about the morals of the people in this profession. I am a top executive in a large firm and have no issues with self-confidence, handling tough situations, and making decisions that affect thousands of people. I was very excited that my husband decided to join the force because I always had respect for people who risked their lives, were willing to forgo weekends and holidays to make sure that we all sleep well. Somehow, through the grape wine of friends and those whose husbands have been on the force for a while, I learned the bitter truth of just how loose the rules enforced upon the rest of the population are for cops....

JJ, thank you as well for coming out and honestly admitting "that fidelity is not a lived by value in law enforcement". That's big! Mrs. Grant here portrayed the law enforcement as a different breed of people. In the way, I don't disagree, but... they are very far from being saint������������ When she says "Cops come with a basic set of values (at least they are hired with them), which gives you a common starting point as a couple" she's generalizing what the "values" really mean. Just because you haven't taken any drugs for a certain period of time before you start testing for the police academy, doesn't mean you haven't used drugs. Or, just because you never used drugs doesn't mean you have values. In my mind, if you are a person with values, you love and care for your family, you don't hurt or harm others in any way, you are honest, you don't steal from others, and, certainly you are faithful to your spouse or significant other. Both Kathryn and I are faced with the same situation of sending our husbands and fathers of our children to a work environment, where, as we all now know, people cheat on their spouses amongst themselves.... Why? How? What gives the right to a cop to say: "it's OK for me to do that"? In our everyday lives, in any occupation, female and male professionals work together all the time. Long hours, stressful situations, etc. Yet, if God forbid, someone in a corporate environment gets a wind of two people working in the same company, who are married to others, having an affair, they will pay for it dearly to HR. Why is it that law enforcement is the one that admittedly stands out in terms of leniency to infidelity? Who flirts with who is not even relevant. There are extensive scientific studies which indicate that both female and male humans are attracted to uniform. But no one said that once you become a cop, you always have a green light to openly flirt and sleep with your own and, as long as it's consentual, not even get a slap on the wrist. JJ, I have to agree with you that it takes two to tango, however, we, as a society, should do something about this artificially created environment which is so forgiving to infidelity and sexual relations amongst co-workers. After all, guys, we trust you with our lives, we trust that if something happens to us, we will be protected by that "authority figure" called police officer who KNOWS BETTER, who knows and does what's right. How can the rest of the population sleep well when we know that our "knights in shining armor" sleep... with each other?

Im 19 years old and I am currently in school.... I jus wanted to say that this blog was very interesting to me because the carrer I am looking towards is Police Officer I would like to know.. " Whats the day of a Female Police Officer like?" Yes I know its dangerous but If any female police officer can answer that question for me i would be more than glad... Thankxz

my husband (not a cop) and a married female officer had an affair for a yr. we got divorced after 23yrs, the female cop got her second divorce, and they are together. he is 16yrs older than her. she has never had a child, we have two. How can a women police officer who fights for respect everyday cheat with another womens husband? i am shocked by the lack of morals, would she have my back during a crime? My xhusband did this but she did this also. i have no respect for her or her job.